Book Corner - Coping with Grief
By: Dianne McKissock, Mal McKissock
We have suggested this book to many of our grieving families. But really it is a book that should be read by everyone who have experienced grief and those who are yet to. All of us will experience grief at some point in our lives, yet very few of us have any experience in knowing how to deal with grief or how to support those around us dealing with grief and loss.
This book talks the reader through the many stages of grief and the rollercoaster of emotions you will go through. From the funeral, to the first most difficult year. It assures the reader that whatever you are feeling is perfectly normal and is a process. So many of the feelings that will surface can seem frightening and painful but these emotions are an integral part of your grief journey. This book offers practical support and information.
The book is set in Australia so it is written for that audience but would translate to anywhere really. It is written in bite sized segments that you can dip in and out of. I found it an easy read with something for every age group including children. What I took personally from this well written little book is that the grief process is different for everyone, no two journeys look the same. It is important that everyone grieves the way they need to. It was straightforward and to the point, a very practical guide.
Grief is something very few of us can escape and I think this book does a good job of explaining what grief can look like and how to face it. Understanding that some days will be good and other days not so good.
Coping with Grief talks about the hard subjects. I liked that it covered the topic of anger, because often when we talk to families they are surprised by how angry they feel. Often trying their hardest to bury this emotion, feeling that it is not an appropriate way to feel. I know when I lost my best friend in a motorbike accident, I was angry. Angry to lose him, angry to understand why, and anger was the hardest emotion to deal with. I can remember striking out a priest whom I was very fond of because he told me that “everything happens for a reason.” I found it hard to grieve because I couldn’t move past my anger.
I spent many years, being very angry. It wasn’t healthy but I didn’t know how to deal with it, so I buried it. I wish I had could have read my sixteen-year-old self this book, I think it would have helped me a great deal, if I could have understood that often, anger is a very normal part of the grieving process, a healthy part of the grieving process, a necessary part and that you will find your way through and make peace with yourself.
Grieving is an incredibly difficult and personal thing, there is nothing that truly makes it easier but I do believe that understanding grief perhaps allows you to work through it in a more supported way. Coping with Grief is must read for anyone, whether you have lost someone or not.
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